Happy Sunday evening my loves!!!
I hope this week treated you all so amazing!
Life’s been balls to the wall for me lately and I needed to wave the white flag. I actually spent about 102% of the day yesterday doing as little as possible.
It was just what I needed to regroup. I haven’t been feeling the best. I honored my body and will never regret that decision.
Today has been such an AMAZING day though!!!!
My life is such that I am very hit or miss on whether I am able to physically attend church on Sundays.
If I could take the best parts of my life and squish them all together this wouldn’t be a problem. But it is what it is.
Today I was able to attend my beloved church and damn did that feel amazing. It was the major rejuvenation and refuel I was needing. I love my pastor and church more than words can even describe.
Mmmmm. Love this place ☺️
I was reflecting on my run after church today though about how I don’t physically attend church as much as I used to. And it isn’t because I’m just laying in bed Sunday mornings and don’t drive there. It’s because of logistics and what not.
I distinctly remember when I first embarked on my spiritual and religious journey I was like a fish out of water.
I had been around some of the most interesting people and groups claiming to be strong in their faith only to be some of the most judgemental, shallow, heinous peeps I had ever seen.
So when I first committed to my faith and growing into this relationship with God I felt like I was walking on egg shells.
What if I can’t make it one Sunday? What if I wear the wrong thing? Is it bad I don’t hardly know any scripture etc etc etc.
These are fear based questions that would rattle around in my brain and cause me anxiety. Because there are plenty of people that are quick to judge and point fingers when in fact their windex cleaner must have run out because they are not lookin in their own mirror at themselves.
And you know what…. F✨ck that.
That’s not how our relationship with God or our journey is supposed to be.
Although I can’t and don’t physically attend church every Sunday I know that’s just a small baby morsel of it.
I’m confident enough in my heart now to know He is so much more supportive of me when I am hitting the streets trying to find out of the box ways for women to be positive about their bodies and learn to love themselves thus radiating that out into the world.
He smiles much more when I make it my goal to leave peeps better off than when I find them. Whether that’s with a sincere compliment, a smile to a random passerbyer (is that a word 🤔) or a hugs for everyone.
Our relationship is truly what we do outside of those walls. Do we radiate joy and love, grace and forgiveness like He teaches us to? And emulate Him?
Or do we slap a few God memes on our Facebook, attend church just because that’s what’s your supposed to do to look good, but then lose track of the principles of what we should have learned about life and love and instead sling mud and hate when you think no ones looking?
Friends. I struggle IMMENSELY with all of this. Something recently brought light to me that burns pretty deep in my heart.
You see, going to church is an amazing thing! It’s so powerful to be surrounded by like minded, joy radiating people. There is power in numbers for sure!
In both sides of the railroad tracks though.
I think when we walk in faith and love and with God it’s important to be mindful of how we choose to spend our energy claiming to be a follower.
Do we use our leadership and inspiration for the greatest and highest most loving good for all? Or do we use our power in numbers to inflict pain and hatred on another whilst claiming to be a God loving individual.
So my burning feeler today was that it really matters not that I can’t be physically in those 4 walls or doing mission trips.
What I know in my heart and what I think is important to speak out to you all is that it matters what you do the remainder of the hours and days of the week.
Don’t get down on yourself if you felt the call to get on with your religious journey but haven’t been able to attend church. For whatever reason. You can start now, with what you have, right where you are.
I believe a large part of our relationship with Him, is how much of a love and light source can we be? How much can we listen to those God whispers that he puts in our hearts to live out our dreams and be positive impacts thus creating the butterfly effect or else more positive ripples for others to do the same.
It’s not about attendance. I have more confidence that He is much more excited by someone living the Word than by numbly walking in those walls each Sunday to keep your good public persona but not acting out His will the remainder of the time.
So the point of my rant?
Start there. Start with smiles to strangers, letting people in traffic. Start with forgiving yourself for something your ashamed of that you keep locked away in the vault. Start with shutting down gossip. Start with looking at yourself in the eyes in the mirror and telling your damn self that you love you.
Those are all enormous actions to ignite the light. Trust me you will be doing so much more for all of us. Relax also. I know enough now to know He does not want us to feel shame about ourselves or feel stress or anxiety or fear judgement from others.
Inspiration and joy does not blossom in those conditions. And that’s precisely what we all need to much more of.
My love for you all is endless.
a. Danielle ❣️