Good morning my loves 💕
I’m not sure if it’s the planetary alignment but does anyone else feel on edge, a little extra overwhelmed and that peeps are trying your nerves at every turn???
Or maybe it’s Mother Nature working on me??? 🤔
At any rate I have something new to write about 🎉 And I’m going to waste zero time jumping right in.
It will never cease to amaze me at the magnitude at which people can be dickheads.
The worst is when they seemingly have not the slightest clue in the world that the yuck that comes flowing out of their mouths smells like an over flowing porta potty that’s spent weeks rotting in the dead of the summer heat….
Let me set the stage for you…
When I am at the gym working out PLEASE don’t come up and interrupt me and talk to me EVEN if I am the last person on the planet to talk to because that is my “me” time. My therapy. It’s the solid few minutes of the day I am focusing solely on my mind, body, and soul simultaneously…. I don’t mean to be unfriendly when I say that….
But I value that time more than anything on the planet. And you should too. It gets all the good feels flowin 💫
This time is so vitally important to me that I cannot even begin to fully illustrate. A simple head nod is beautiful and will suffice.
Yesterday I was minding my own business running on the treadmill and completely lost in reading my book when an acquaintance came up beside me to interrupt.
He startled me because I was actually in such a solid groove between a good stride and the good soul food from the pages of the book.
I jumped off to the side rails and muted my headphones and told him that he scared me.
Shit went downhill fast from there….
Guy proceeds to start right in being “funny” I guess?
Comedy show starts something like this:
“Well maybe you need to wear a few more bracelets and maybe add some to your ankles”….. 😳
Many of you that have actually seen me in real life know I am fond of my bracelets – I wear oodles of them from all walks of life and I LOVE THEM.
Do I give a f🌪ck what anyone else thinks about me and my bracelets?? Nope.
Do I want to rip this guys face off and toss his peepers up in the air like confetti at this point?? YUP. 🙂
He goes on to ask me what I am reading and I’m so off guard because I’m irritated that he’s not only interrupted my run, but he’s started right out the gates by mocking me.
For a FLEETING moment my protective little brain said “DONT tell him what your reading… it will save you…….”
But as with much else I didn’t heed the warning and shared with him that I am training to be a life coach and a self love guide and was doing my homework.
I’ll pause here to tell you that I am a lover of epic proportions… I can forgive and fight hate back with love harder than most…
Guy rolls his eyes, shakes his head and makes exaggerated movements to show me his distaste in my choice…
And here folks…. is where the flying monkeys went ape shit. 🔪🔪🔪
When he was done with his spectacle he began to open his mouth to continue his mindless degradation of pretty much everything about me… And I unloaded.
I was like “How do you come over here and ask me about what I’m doing and squash my dreams when I tell you? I don’t get what’s so fucking funny about my wanting to be a coach and help people to learn to love not only themselves better but to then be able to love others more???”
His comedy skit is not done folks.
He gets defensive and asks why I can’t take a joke….
Maybe I could have had more patience but I was already irritated that he would interupt me while I was running…
I was like NO. I can’t take a joke. Not about something that I am this passionate about and is this important to me about changing the quality of lives in people so that we can all live more joyfull, fullfilling lives. NO.
He goes on to say well the reason he responded like that was because the wife of an old buddy of his used to hit on him and flirt with him behind his buddy’s back. She was wanting to be a life coach… yada yada. (IDGAF).
Now this guys a firefighter…. if you know chapters of old life you will get the connection here…
I respond only in the kindest, most angelic, Christian (read: guns blazing) way I can bring myself up to…
I said “Well that’s like saying all firefighters have small giblets and are cheaters…”….
AND now guy has some skin in the game…. Talk about a persons giblets and suddenly they wake up 🙄
He goes on some rant about how not all firefighters are this way or that… I drown out his bullshit noise out because it’s either do that or headbutt this asshole and well……. I’m a delicate f🌟cking flower… Mmmmmkay 😌
He goes on to say that this buddies wife was a whore and was humping eveyone at the gym and some of the trainers and more yada yada of epic proportions.
Listen. I give zero shits what she’s doing with her vagina, or what anyone does with theirs for that matter.
And actually at this point I was wishing her magestic vagina would come swallow guy up and carry him to a far off land so I could resume my run. 🙂
There was more banter and none of it was pretty. It ended with him saying he should take me to lunch to make up for it… and the only way I’d consider that at this point is if Mr. Snib could poop on his plate and I could rub it in guys eyebrows and ears. 🙂
Man I’m angelic today 🤔
This guy rattled me and here’s why:
I HATE dream crushing of any kind….
I grew up with a dream crusher, married a dream crusher and have since been in recovery of learning to get back to the authentic me and grow courage enough to be able to stand up, be brave and walk in my truth.
And let me tell you… it’s not been easy. In fact it’s been pretty effin scary.
I have had moments where fear overwhelms to me to the point it where it paralyzes me and the sugar plums start whispering sweet nothings to me about how stupid, dumb, not good enough, worthless etc etc etc I am….
I spent the next few miles distracted and trying to shake off what happened to me.
I respectfully allowed all the feels about the situation do their thang because I have found that the more resistance I have against wanting to force feelings like anger away… the more it rears its ugly head.
This is where I have come to learn that the lesson is being shined and polished and ready to emerge. I just need to be patient…. EEEEK and tons of yuck because I’m not good at patience… 😩 or moderation. 😜
This is what I have come up with.
I think that when we spend time working and growing ourselves and striving to get out of the box of normalcy we will be met with new challenges….
There is that saying new level, new devils and I believe that a million percent.
I see now where I was being tested….. I was given an opportunity to have my new found passion and desire and soul purpose in life tested and challenged against how strongly I feel about it and how much courage I have to stand up for what I believe in…
My options in that situation were to fall back into old patterns and habits of thinking and make myself small again at the first sign of someone ridiculing or dream crushing my visions…
OR stand solid in my resolve that while what I have written on my heart may not be mainstream or normal…it IS me and who I am…
Friends oh sweet friends….
I was not made to be mediocre. And neither were you.
After the flying monkeys settled back down and the steam stopped rolling out of my ears I was able to dig in the rubble of what happened to locate the gem that is the blessing. There is a blessing in everything…. it’s up to us to dig around in the muck sometimes to find it.
I’m thankful now that guy presented himself to me because if I can’t handle that little bit of heat, Lord knows I won’t be able to handle bigger, more scary and hurtful adversities the deeper into my journey I travel.
This is where I know God had his hand in this situation… It’s just when you think he’s on a smoke break or something and not paying attention… that you get in these situations and wonder to yourself why he would put you in harms way…. but….
But we must know that it is safe to step out of the box. It’s safe to travel away from the group and make our own path. It’s safe to show up and be our unique beautiful selves and it’s beyond OK to be different.
In my heart I see visions where we are celebrated for what we each bring to the table instead of met with mockery and backstabbing.
It my belief that others are so uncertain of themselves that they simply don’t know what to do when they see someone else find their radiant inner spark and begin to use it ✨
I love this…. I love encouragement. It’s so blissful and peaceful and delicious.
I have spent too many years living someone else’s life…. it’s beyond time to start living MY purpose.
I’ll wrap up the story with a little God wink… as I was walkin away from my treadmill I happened to look down and see a lucky penny.
I love finding penny’s. I think they are good omens. A feeling of calmness succumbed me. I walked to the locker room and told Nancy, one of my most favorite peeps on earth that works in the gym about how I found a lucky penny and was gonna win the lotto so I didn’t have to go to my meetings the rest of the week. 🍀💚💫🌟
I took this penny as a wink from God that I’m doing what I am supposed to be doing. I see it as encouragement to keep on truckin, have faith in the things I am being asked to do and hold on even tighter to that faith when I feel like He’s thrown me to the wolves….
I soooooooo invite you to join me to go on your own brave and beautiful journey. Your supported more than you know and more equipped for challenges than you can ever dream.
Let’s do the damn thang 🤘🏾
All my love…
a. Danielle 🔥